“Beginnings: Wolverine: X-men Origins: The Commencement,” or whatever it’s called, is your standard mutant-superhero-gratuitous-Hugh-Jackman-topless-bio pic. It’s worth a bucket of corn and a matinee priced ticket but that’s about it.
Hugh Jackman does a fine job as Wolverine but Ryan Reynolds steals the show as Wade Wilson, the dude that becomes the killing machine known as Wading Pool (not the dude that becomes the quarterback for the Oakland Raiders).
Reynolds brings a breath of fresh air to the flick, even though he’s completely unbelievable as a super hero. No worries though, he’s in the movie for about two seconds.
Liev Schreiber was great as Wolverine’s brother and mutant Snagglepuss. In the movie he’s called Vicky.
Will I. Am was apparently cast to draw a younger crowd with “stupid-ability.” He certainly wasn’t included in the movie for his “act-ability.” I. Am plays some ridiculous mutant with teleporting capabilities. He should have teleported himself off the movie set and back to the music studio.
Danny Huston goes out on a ledge and portrays the movie’s main villain, Colonel Strikeout. For Huston it was the role of a lifetime.
Taylor Kitsch, who plays Gumbo, suffers from that rampant Hollywood disease of “accent-disappear-itis.” Gumbo’s Creole accent comes and goes. By the end of the movie the Louisiana-born Gumbo suddenly turns into a surfer dude from Glendale.
The film is similar in structure to other X-men movies. The plot is quite involved and very interesting. There’s a lot to the story so in order to get everything in filmmakers had to hurry through the story at break neck speed. The upside to this rush is they avoid a Watchmen-length movie. The downside is it’s very cluttered.
There are some good action scenes, cool mutant abilities, corny one-liners and a lot of good-old-fashion mugging by Jackson et al. All these elements come together and make for a fairly satisfying Wolverine movie. With that being said, “Starting Up: Wolverine: X-men: Chapter 1, the Beginning” suffers from a few plot holes.
The big bad government types infuse Wolverine with this indestructible metal called Adamantium. After that Agent Zero, also known as Gilbert Arenas and portrayed by Daniel Henney, is sent by Colonel Strikeout to assassinate Wolverine.
Despite being the world’s greatest marksman (his mutant power must be aiming) Agent Zero fails to kill Wolverine (what a surprise). Then a scientist tells Strikeout that Zero didn’t stand a chance against Wolverine and the only way to kill him is with Adamantium bullets. These bullets are only used in the film’s final scene.
I don’t know much about tracking and eliminating superheroes, but wouldn’t you give the super bullets to the guy who’s a real good shot to begin with?
Kayla Silverchair, who’s mutant power is tactile hypnosis (how cool does that sound although in the comics that’s not her mutant power) gets involved in this byzantine scam to get Wolverine to agree to be infused with Admantium (yawn). She does this not because she’s evil, but because her sister, Emma Frost, is being held by the bad guys.
Now it’s never clear if Wolverine is hypnotized by her, but if he was you’d think she’s just hypnotize him to think adamantium would be good for his bones. Regardless, why do the bad guy’s bidding when all you have to do is touch Colonel Strikeout and demand the release of your sister?
Apparently the best way to handle your enemies is to make them indestructible. After all that’s what Strikeout did to Wolverine when he gave him adamantium bones.
Now after the procedure there was some line about erasing Wolverine’s memory but, if you could erase Wolverine’s memory why not do that before you make him indestructible?
Lastly, a group of mutants has to escape a nuclear power plant where they were being held captive. To reach safety they have to walk through a maze of tunnels located under the plant. Not one of the half-dozen or so mutants has a power that could have helped them escape more easily? Why be a mutant if you have to walk?
“Wolverine X : The Original Men: Genesis” has some holes but the gaps in logic shouldn’t stop you from enjoying this action-oriented romp. If you like X-men, half-naked Hugh Jackman and excessive preening then you’ll enjoy this movie.
By the way, both Wolverine and the X-men are in the Land of Punt.